Welcome to Silly Con Valley.

The ultimate 90s tech startup simulation. Pitch finicky VCs, survive chaotic market trends, and chase the elusive $1 Billion IPO

Build Your Empire. Try Not to Go Bankrupt

Take on the role of CEO in a chaotic, satirical startup environment. Start in a dingy Garage and hustle your way to a massive Tech Campus. You’ll need to develop hype-driven products, hire eccentric tech talent, and manage your action points every week before your cash burn rate hits -$50,000. Choose your CEO archetype—are you the visionary, the suit, or the influencer?—and lead your company to unicorn status

Retro “SiliconOS 95” Interface	Card-Based Pitch Battles	Dynamic Market Trends	Ruthless Social Feed
Immerse yourself in a fully functional 90s desktop environment complete with a Start Menu, a trash can, and an ever-watching “ChadGDP” assistant	Face off against VCs like “The Shark” or “The Dinosaur” in strategic card battles. Use your team to play Strategy, Vision, and Buzzword cards to break down investor skepticism – Ready for funding?	Pivot your product to match shifting weekly trends. Ride the wave of AI/ML Hype, VR Dreams, Blockchain Magic, or Fintech Scams to boost your revenue	Manage your team’s morale carefully. If you push them too hard with “Crunch Time” or resort to layoffs, expect brutal roasts and insider rumors on your dashboard’s Twitter-like social fee

The Road to $1 Billion

Garage	Co-working	Tech Campus	IPO
Start your business like all champions do. From the garage.	Upgrade your office to a co-working space where you gain access to more powerful CTO’s and hype managers.	The ultimate place for market domination.	This is where legends are made and losers are forgotten. Beat the bankers of London, sharks of Hong Kong and finally nail the New York vampires to ring the IPO and become a startup legend.