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Welcome to Silly Con Valley

The epic startup simulator – Now available for iOS

Now available for iOS

Build Your Empire. Try Not to Go Bankrupt

Take on the role of CEO in a chaotic, satirical startup environment. Start in a dingy Garage and hustle your way to a massive Tech Campus. You’ll need to develop hype-driven products, hire eccentric tech talent, and manage your action points every week before your cash burn rate hits -$50,000. Choose your CEO archetype—are you the visionary, the suit, or the influencer?—and lead your company to unicorn status

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Retro “SiliconOS 95” Interface
Immerse yourself in a fully functional 90s desktop environment complete with a Start Menu, a trash can, and an ever-watching “ChadGDP” assistant
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Card-Based Pitch Battles
Face off against VCs like “The Shark” or “The Dinosaur” in strategic card battles. Use your team to play Strategy, Vision, and Buzzword cards to break down investor skepticism – Ready for funding?
80s Silicon Valley environment illustration, high-stakes VC pitch meeting room, long conference table with VCs along one side, single founder seat on opposite side facing tribunal, projection screen showing pitch deck frozen on hockey stick, water glasses untouched due to nervous dry mouth, clicker in founder's hand slightly trembling, VCs in various states of attention - checking phones typing bored, one VC leaning forward interested creating hope, harsh overhead lighting making founder sweat visible, clock on wall suggesting time running out, door behind founder representing escape or rejection, whiteboard with previous pitch residue hastily erased, 80s high-stakes meeting aesthetic, editorial illustration style, five minutes to change everything or nothing energy --chaos 5 --ar 9:16 --profile pcokcx1 --v 7 Job ID: 4973e194-2e41-4793-9ede-ff681d6a8a40
Dynamic Market Trends
Pivot your product to match shifting weekly trends. Ride the wave of AI/ML Hype, VR Dreams, Blockchain Magic, or Fintech Scams to boost your revenue
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Garage
Start your business like all champions do. From the garage.
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Co-working
Upgrade your office to a co-working space where you gain access to more powerful CTO’s and hype managers.
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Tech Campus
The ultimate place for market domination.

Survive Quarter 1 to Quarter 4 earnings report, fend off Hostile Takeovers from AI competitors, and prepare for your ultimate test.

Once you hit a $10 Million valuation, embark on a 3-stage IPO roadshow across London, Hong Kong, and New York. Ring the bell and win it all!

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Download for free from Apple App store

Want to complain about your burn rate? Join the community of Silly Con Valley.